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Mother flippin' button-fly jeans

Who decided it was a good idea, and when did we all agree…
So it seems that at some point in history some dude decided that he would be fitting his jeans with buttons all the way down…. I’ve heard people state that this style is the classic jean style. I’ve heard other try to convince me (or more likely themselves) that button fly jeans are nicer or better than those with a zip fly. Well do you know what? They’re wrong! Classic jeans, in my opinion have a zip fly and there is absolutely no reason why having buttons instead of a zip constitutes a pair of jeans or even trousers to be better than any others!
Now I’ll admit, I personally own a couple of pairs of jeans that have a button fly. For whatever reason these jeans were actually more expensive than my others and thus are of a higher quality in general. The denim itself on them is of a higher quality and thanks to this they are very comfortable to wear.
Having said this I dont wear them anywhere near as often as I wear my less comfortable, cheaper jeans and it’s all down to the fact that with my others I don’t have to undo my belt and get half naked before I can take a leak. There’s no hassle, no issues. Just a simple pair of trousers with all the features a good pair needs.
I mean seriously what the hell is the deal with having a button fly? I’d love to know exactly how or why they are better? In my eyes the only advantage there could possibly be is that you can’t trap you family jewels in a button fly. But then all you need to do is not be a mentalist when you’re doing up your zip. Simple! Do people really enjoy having a constant breeze on their bits, hassle going to the toilet and at times sore fingers trying to do the things back up? It’s beyond me!
Give me a cheap pair of zipper fly washed out jeans any day of the week. Zipper FTW!
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